Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category
Dear God
Tag, I’m It.
Derek tagged me. So… I get to list six weird things about me. I tend to think everything about me is a little weird, so this might be tough to choose just six. Here goes…
1.) One of my favorite snacks is two pieces of American cheese put together, then folded over until they “break” into four smaller pieces stacked on top of each other. In a perfect world, I eat this while drinking Mountain Dew.
2.) I pretty much can’t function until I have a shower in the morning after I wake up. I have a pretty strict routine I follow from the time I step out of bed until I’m dressed. Not so much because I’m anal, but more because I don’t want to forget something. It’s not a good feeling going to work and realizing I’ve forgotten to comb my hair or brush my teeth. So… I just do everything in order so that I don’t forget anything.
3.) I like some music that other people think is really weird. I enjoy techno music, for example.
4.) I’m more content sitting in front of a computer than sitting in front of a TV.
5.) When I was a little kid, I had what I called “little people.” I would cut up crayons into small pieces, use small nuts (the hardware kind), the little rubber balls that would come with toy guns… anything in that same realm of small things. With these things, I would act out sports games and other very dramatic events on my bedroom floor. I kept them in a Zip Lock bag. Once, I took them on a trip and was dismayed when the crayons melted from being left in a hot vehicle. It was a tragic loss of “lives.”
6.) I don’t like the color brown. I’m not sure UPS could pay me enough to work for them.
BONUS: I think the trombone is far from being “God’s instrument” as my college band director says. In fact, I think it is the least useful instrument outside of a bassoon or oboe. I can’t respect an instrument that causes me to think of circus music anytime I think about it. Sorry trombone-playing friends.
Okay. Now I get to tag other people. I think I’ll tag Rick, Cari, Shane, and the rest of the band.
This. Is. Hilarious
If you have some time to kill, PLEASE check out this story. You will laugh. Maybe a lot, like me. It’s very funny.
Mission: Best Buy
More Evidence That I’m the Biggest Geek I Know
Last night, I spent two hours (while watching UK get beat by Chris Lofton and Tennessee) putting book tabs in my new Scofield NIV Bible. A few people poked fun at me tonight at church (Lori, Dennis). I don’t care what they think. I can find
Nahum 2:55 He remembers his officers;
they stumble as they go,
they hasten to the wall;
the siege tower is set up.
quicker than them.
Everything I Ever Knew I Learned On the Internet
My most recent interest in web development is learning CSS. I’ll save the details for those of you who aren’t web design savvy. But, in short, it’s a neat little coding feature that makes site layout simple (font sizes, colors, borders, margins, etc.).
I considered purchasing CSS for Dummies, but I thought better. I decided to google (perhaps my first-ever use of the word “google” as a verb – seriously) “CSS.” As it turns out, I’ve found out all sorts of helpful knowledge tonight in a very short while. All for free.
This leads me to the title of this post – “Everything I Ever Knew I Learned on the Internet.” Despite the fair amount of trash on the web these days, there’s an equal or greater amount of educational & valuable information. Maybe this is why I’m so fascinated with the internet. There’s not much that you can’t find out about on the web. I imagine this is how folks felt about cable TV when it first started.
I be smarter all cuz I got that there Interweb.
Get Your 2006 Hooters Calendar
Just a friendly reminder…if you haven’t already doneso, pick up a copy of the 2006 Hooters calendar.
(work safe, I promise – and funny)
High Tech
As I type today’s blog entry, I’m contemplating whether or not to take my iPod Kroger-ing. Not that I care much what people think of me, but I’m just wondering what sort of looks I’d get listening to music while I shop.
The only reason I mention this is due to an incident at Wal-Mart a couple of weeks ago. I decided to wear my hands-free ear piece while I shopped – I was expecting a couple of phone calls. As is usually the case at Wal-Mart, I saw a couple of people I knew. Both of them commented on my “high tech” ear piece to my phone.
Come on, people. High tech? Haven’t ear pieces for phones been around for a few years now? While most techies are moving to wireless Bluetooth ear pieces, I’m still stuck on old technology (a rarity for me, actually).
Such is the case with Frankfort, however. I’m sure in big cities, it’s quite normal for people to listen to iPods while they shop for groceries. It’s probably quite normal to see people walking around with space-age devices attached to their ears while they communicate with other space-age humans. Not in Frankfort. It always take a bit longer for technology to take hold in Frankfort.
I’m gonna push the envelope. I’m taking my iPod to Kroger. It’s time people hop on the technology train. It’s time to take grocery shopping to a new level. I’m going to lead the way.
What Time Is It?
Some peculiar you might notice about my apartment – the number of time-keeping devices that are present. In no particular order:
1. Cell phone
2. (2) Two wall clocks
3. (3) Three alarm clocks
4. Stove
5. Microwave
6. DVD Recorder
7. (2) Two watches
If you want to get picky…
8. (2) Two computers synced with “official” U.S. time
9. Cable TV
Perhaps if I paid more attention to some of these time-keeping devices I’d make a little more of my time?
Disgustingly Big
Several weeks ago, I went to a movie with friends from church. I decided to go all out and order some nachos and a “large Coke.” I was floored when they handed me a jug of Coke, instead. I mean…come on! Who – seriously – needs THIS much Coke at one time?
My New Job As Mayor
I’m not big on video games. Actually – I am. It’s just… I can’t allow myself to play them. I get caught up in them and play them for hours. I own a decent amount of games for Playstation (yes – I’m still playing the PS1), and a handful of computer games.
I started playing SimCity 3000 (still haven’t made it to SimCity 4 just yet) again a little over a week ago. Last Friday night? Yeah… played for about five hours. A couple of nights ago? Close to three hours.
I’m going to start a support group – VGA. Video Gamers Anonymous.

